TMI Tuesday – Would you rather…?


Would you rather:

  1. Have sex with someone who never showers or someone who never brushes their teeth?
    Definitely the never showers option. After all, just because they never shower doesn’t mean they don’t bathe or wash or have poor personal hygiene, it simply means they don’t shower. Not sure how you can have good dental hygiene without brushing your teeth (flossing alone isn’t going to do it), so that would be a definite no from me.
  2. Only have sex in the shower for the rest of your life or only have sex on the floor for the rest of your life?
    I’m not a big fan of shower sex, so this one is easy; the floor wins every time. To be fair, I’ve been fucked on the floor often enough that it doesn’t actually seem like an unreasonable alternative (and since it isn’t explicitly disallowed, cushions/blankets/etc. can always be added to the floor).
  3. Cry every time you had sex or burp every time someone kissed you?
    Sex often involves tears for me, especially when Master C is being particularly harsh/firm/strict so, as with the previous answer, it doesn’t seem such a bad option to me.
  4. Find out the last person you had sex with was your long lost cousin or that the person you last had sex with was a brutal serial killer?
    Cousin definitely wins this one.

Bonus: Would you rather always say what you are thinking or never be able to speak again?
Since I wouldn’t be able to do my job if I couldn’t talk, nor be able to earn any form of punishment for making bratty remarks, saying what I think is probably the best option (especially given that I’m often thinking about getting fucked, sucking Master C’s cock or coming up with ingenious ways to earn myself a spanking/thrashing).

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TMI Tuesday – That’s Life


1. Who do you prefer to discuss politics with?
a. partner
b. best friend
c. co-workers
d. strangers
e. parents
I try not to discuss politics at all if I can get away with it, but if I have to, it’ll probably be with Master C or one of my friends.

2. Which is more offensive to you: book burning or flag burning? Why?
In my opinion, books are sacred, even the trashy ones, so that is definitely more offensive. Knowledge is power, censorship is oppression. A flag is just a bit of coloured cloth.

3. Complete the sentence. Most of all, I want to meet someone who deserves my _____ :
a. trust.
b. loyalty.
c. admiration.
d. love.
I would say, where Master C is concerned, He absolutely deserves all of the above, without question. In any other situation, being deserving of my trust is definitely the most important consideration.

4. Which kind of fidelity (being faithful) is more important to you?
a. Physical/Sexual.
b. Mental/Emotional.
c. Neither is important.
d. Both are equally important.
It absolutely has to be Mental/Emotional. Given that Master C and I are polyamorous, the idea of sexual exclusivity is clearly not one that applies, but our non-monogamy is always based on it being consensual, open and honest.

5. Would you avoid all contact with an ex if your current significant other asked you to?
a. Yes, of course!
b. No. This would be an unacceptable demand.
c. Only if their justification seems reasonable.
Given that Master C would almost certainly never do this, I’m not sure where I stand on this. I think, it would lie somewhere between b. and c. If there were a reasonable justification then I probably would have already broken off contact and so the question wouldn’t arise, but if there were no reasonable justification, I would find it unacceptable.

Bonus: If you were to die, the person going through your belongings would be shocked to find _____ ?
If they know me at all, I’m almost certain that none of my possessions would shock them. If anything, it would be my more ordinary and mundane possessions that would probably raise eyebrows, anything in anyway associated with kink would be almost certainly be taken for granted.

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Expressing my needs and wants


To a lot of people, D/s must look like it is weighted entirely of the Dominant partner; with them able to make demands upon the submissive to satisfy their own needs (any satisfaction the submissive derives would, seemingly, be secondary). I can kind of understand where that preconception comes from; D/s imagery does tend to depict the Dominant partner taking what they want from the submissive, inflicting their will upon them, while the submissive simply has to endure whatever treatment their Dominant metes out.

In a way, there is a kernel of “truth” to that view, but it does neglect the fact that the submissive is still human, has wants and needs of their own that need to be addressed and, ultimately, has as much right to withdraw consent as the the Dominant partner. The depictions really only give half the story; they show the “taking” side of the Dominant’s role, but they don’t depict the (in my opinion) even more important aspect, which is the “giving” side; the side that ensures the submissive’s needs are also being met.

So how does this work?

Well, each D/s relationship will have its own “rules” for the wants and needs of each partner are expressed.

Within our relationship, the basic premise is that Master C tells, whereas I ask.  It’s pretty much as simple as that. If Master C tells me that he is going to bend me over the arm of the sofa, spank me, then fuck me hard, I can be reasonably certain that I’m going to get bent over the sofa, have my arse spanked to a lovely warm glowing pinkness that has my cunt on fire, and then He will fuck me.

I should point out that I am allowed to say “no” or “stop”, but if I actually mean it, then it is said in Gaelic. I don’t really have a safe word, I kind of have a safe language.  Master C will happily ignore any sobbed cries of “no!” or “stop”, knowing I am happy for Him to continue. A “chan eil” or “stad” on the other hand, means I’ve had enough, or I’m not enjoying it, or I’m (unlikely as it may seem) just not in the mood. On the rare occasions that this is employed, I can pretty much guarantee that it will result in me having to “atone” in some way for depriving Him, but that’s all part of our dynamic too.

So, what about my needs? Well, as I said, I ask.  There are two ways of doing this, one is the pleading approach, such as, “I really want to feel your lovely cock inside me, will you please fuck me?” or, “Can I please suck your cock?”  The other approach is to phrase it in such a way as if I’m making a suggestion, such as, “My cunt is so wet, would you like to taste?” or “Would you like me to give you a blow-job?” or “Do you want to use my arse as well as my cunt?”.

The approach I adopt will depend, partially on circumstances, and partially on my mood. If Master C is in need of some TLC, I’ll tend to use the “suggestion” method, “Why don’t you just sit back and relax and your dutiful little slut will suck you cock? Would you like that?” If I’m the one that’s being needy, the the “pleading” method is more likely to be employed, “I really need to feel your lovely thick cock inside me. Will you please fuck me? Please?”

Of course, sometimes just happen organically in the moment. A cuddle on the sofa can end up with His cock being in my mouth, or His tongue on my clit before moving on to a slow, sensual shag or us fucking like wild animals on heat. Sometimes our needs take over and we don’t need to air them; we simply do what our bodies and moods dictate. For everything else, communication is the key.

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